Prequel Part One
Pairings: Jin x Kame, Yamapi x Kame (one-sided), Jin + Yuichi (friendship)
Author: J
Date: Written 30.12.2007, 02.01.2008 – 03.01.2008; Posted 22.01.2008
Notes: Part 1 of the prequel to the main series. I think the writing style may be a tad bit different. This starts off from some time around early January 2006. Don’t think it matters whether you read the prequel or the series first? I’m actually not sure… ^^;; For Mina. =)
- Crazy Love -
“Are you in love with him?”
Tomohisa reached out to touch the cold hard surface, a defiant look on his face, only to receive the same look of defiance. He frowned.
“Don’t be stupid. I used to hate him, remember? And even though I don’t hate him now, that doesn’t mean I’m in love with him.”
And he’s your best friend’s lover.
Tomohisa closed his eyes, refusing to look at his own reflection. He couldn’t even recognise the person before him anymore. That person was full of jealousy, greed, and was selfish enough to want to steal his best friend’s lover. That wasn’t him. It couldn’t be him.
He sighed, wondering what was happening to himself, wondering what Kazuya had done to him. How quickly they went from good friends to enemies to good friends again, and how he secretly wished they could be more. But that would practically be betrayal to his best friend.
Are they even still together? They’ve been so cold to each other… “They hardly look like they’re in love.”
The voice of that person invaded his mind once more, but the last sentence was clearly audible.
“Shut up. You know they’re only like that because of me. Because of the temporary unit crap- Okay I don’t think it’s ‘crap’ because without it I would never have gotten closer- You know what I’m trying to say, so just shut up.”
It was one thing to have internal thoughts and conversations. It was another to be actually speaking out loud as if the ‘other person’ was really there. Tomohisa pulled his hair, wondering if he was slowly going insane.
Why don’t you ask him then? Your best friend I mean…
“…Jin? …Yeah… maybe I should… maybe I should…”
* * * * *
Jin looked so happy without him.
That was what Kazuya felt, as he watched Jin playing with Yuichi. When was the last time he and Jin fooled around like that? Kazuya couldn’t even remember anymore. Frankly, Kazuya wasn’t sure when it started, when they had started to drift apart.
It definitely started before that even happened, even if tensions between the two of them did rise sharply ever since the group found out about the temporary unit. Kazuya’s only consolation was that Jin seemed to have somewhat gotten over it. Even so, there was that invisible wall still standing between them.
“Itai yo, Nakamaru!” Jin whined, putting on a mock look of hurt, but was ignored by his group mate. Feeling someone else’s attention on him, he turned to the source, meeting Kazuya’s eyes.
A little surprised at being caught staring, Kazuya almost wanted to turn away, but hesitated. He was, after all, staring at his own boyfriend, and he had long gotten over the stage of being embarrassed by things like that.
Their eyes locked for those few seconds, before the moment was broken by the ringing of Jin’s cell phone next to Kazuya. Picking up the phone, Kazuya walked over to where Jin was, handing it over.
“Thanks.” Jin said, as he took it. Kazuya nodded, pausing for a few seconds as the other picked up the call, before turning to walk away.
* * * * *
“Are… Are you two okay?”
Jin took a quick glance at his best friend before turning back to concentrate on their game. It didn’t take a genius to figure out who Tomohisa was referring to. That was all people wanted to talk to him about these days.
He feigned ignorance.
Tomohisa hit the ‘pause’ button on the game.
“I mean you and Kame.”
“What about us?” Jin sighed, seeing that he wasn’t going to be able to avoid the conversation. “I already told you, didn’t I? I’ve gotten over it.”
“I know… But I get the feeling like things haven’t exactly gone back to the way things were… I just hope that… You’re not letting your relationship rot because of something like that, right?”
Jin wondered if the relationship had already started to rot way before it. Maybe he just didn’t notice, or maybe he did, but continued to lie to himself that everything was fine.
Because if there was anything the period of silence between he and Kazuya did, it was to make Jin realise that he didn’t really understand Kazuya anymore.
“I don’t understand him anymore.” Jin said aloud, as if he was admitting a truth he had tried not to believe for a while now.
Tomohisa kept his silence, watching Jin expectantly.
“I don’t understand him anymore.” Jin repeated himself. “It’s almost as if… as if the Kazuya I knew has disappeared?” He turned to look at his best friend, unsure. There was a slight pain in his chest, and it was really uncomfortable. “I can’t find him anymore.”
You’re not looking hard enough, the voice in Tomohisa’s head remarked, but Tomohisa bit back those words, making sure he didn’t say them out loud.
The voice in his head didn’t back down though. It kept screaming that the old Kazuya didn’t disappear, because Tomohisa had seen him on the set every day, and it was the same old Kazuya he used to play with when they were younger. It was the same old Kazuya that Tomohisa had fallen head over heels in love with.
And if Jin couldn’t find Kazuya, it was Jin’s own fault. It was Jin’s fault for chasing Kazuya away. It was Jin’s fault for not being able to understand Kazuya anymore.
“We’ve grown so far apart… It’s like…” Jin continued, but Tomohisa wasn’t paying much attention. The voices in his head were only getting louder by the second, overpowering whatever it was that Jin was saying to him at that moment. The only words Tomohisa manage to register though, made his heart stop beating for a second.
“We’re not a couple anymore.”
* * * * *
Kazuya blinked as he tried to comprehend the situation.
“You don’t have to answer me now.” The other said quickly, nervously.
Kazuya was tired. Having someone cause him confusion on one of his rare days off was not exactly what he would have liked. And since it didn’t look like the other was going to explain to him any further, Kazuya was forced to come to his own conclusions.
“Kame…?” A hand was waving in his face, interrupting his thoughts.
“Yeah?”
“Uh, nothing, uh, I just wondered if you actually, uh, paid attention to what I said.”
Kazuya couldn’t help but smile a little at Tomohisa’s nervousness. It was rather endearing, especially since it was a rare sight. When was Tomohisa ever nervous about things like this? The other had always been so smooth when it came to such matters. It reminded him of someone else.
It reminded him of Jin.
And that’s where it didn’t make any sense to him. Why would Tomohisa ask him such a question? Tomohisa should obviously realise that Kazuya was already taken. Kazuya was with Jin. …Wasn’t he?
“Like I said…” Tomohisa spoke again, almost babbling. “You don’t have to answer me now. Actually… you probably wouldn’t want to enter into another relationship so soon after your previous one ended, right?”
Ended… His previous relationship had already ended.
Or at least that was according to Tomohisa. Kazuya concluded that the other must have gotten the idea from Jin, because he highly doubted that anyone would have dared to come up with such a conclusion unless it was true, even if he himself didn’t know about it until now.
Bastard…
He didn’t even fucking know about it.
* * * * *
When Jin found out about Kazuya and Tomohisa being an item, he was a bit taken aback at first.
“Ne, daijoubu ka?” Yuichi nudged him as he stood spacing for a few seconds.
Jin quickly shook his head, and then nodded. Yuichi looked at him, eyebrows raised, because he couldn’t figure out what Jin’s reply was.
“I’m fine.” Jin said, seeing Yuichi’s confusion. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know. You had a strange look earlier. And…”
“And…?”
“I never knew that the two of you broke up.”
Jin licked his lips, wondering what to say to that. He was a bit confused too, but somehow, he didn’t find himself angry at Kazuya. It was almost as if Kazuya and he already had a silent, mutual agreement to go their separate ways.
As for Tomohisa, he had to admit that he was surprised. He never had any inkling that his best friend was interested in Kazuya, and he was a bit annoyed by the fact. Though he couldn’t decide if it was because he never noticed, or it was because he was never told, or if it was simply because he felt some sort of… betrayal?
“Oi, you have that strange look on your face again.”
“Urusai!” Jin retorted. “If anyone has a weird look, it’s you. And it’s a permanent one too.”
“Kora!”
Jin laughed as he reached out to pinch Yuichi’s nose. “Nakamaru-jisan doesn’t need to worry too much about us. If you keep worrying, your hair will turn white… No wait, you never had any hair to begin with-”
“OI!” Yuichi swatted his hand away. Then he softened his tone. “I can’t help it if I’m just overly concerned about my friends sometimes, okay?”
Jin smiled brightly upon hearing that. Suddenly, he had this strong urge to hug his friend, and he did just that.
“Eh?”
“Shut up. I just need a hug alright?”
“…You’re such a baby.”
“Shut up.”
* * * * *
Prequel Part Two
Pairings: Yamapi x Kame, Yuichi x Kame, Yuichi x Jin, Jin x Kame
Author: J
Date: Written 03.01.2008, 07.01.2008 – 08.01.2008; Posted 22.01.2008
Notes: Part 2 of the prequel. Some time passes after the end of the first part. For Mina, who I hope doesn’t kill me for the lack of her favourite pairing in this. ^^;;
- Lovin’ U -
Tongues twisted together, as they fought a battle of dominance even as Kazuya allowed himself to be taken. A moan escaped both their lips, as each thrust into him only served to send Kazuya closer to the edge.
A small part of him wanted to cry out. He never felt so confused in his life. Each time Tomohisa made love to him, he felt so cherished and loved, but at the same time, he felt some emptiness within him, like he was missing that… something. It only made the guilt in him grow.
He should have never made use of Tomohisa for his silly revenge, a revenge that only proved to be pointless. It was not as if the person who should have been on the receiving end of his anger actually cared.
Jin probably didn’t even realise he was alive.
Kazuya didn’t want to care anymore either.
“I love you.” Tomohisa said to him. The other had said it many times, but Kazuya had never returned the favour. This time though, he found himself saying those words without hesitation.
“I love you too.”
Tomohisa seemed taken aback. Kazuya was too when he realised what he had just said. But seeing a smile forming on his lover’s face, Kazuya simply smiled back, ignoring that empty feeling within.
* * * * *
Jin stared at his empty glass, wondering how many more minutes he had before they were dragged off to sing their debut song for the billionth time. Laughter reached his ears and he turned to the source, the sight of Yuichi laughing his head off at some joke Koki made filled his line of vision.
He turned back to stare at his glass some more, adding a loud dramatic sigh in hopes of catching the other person’s attention. It worked. Soon, he felt someone tap him on the shoulder before poking his cheek.
Jin tried to hide his smile. “Nani?”
“I should be the one asking you that.” Yuichi replied as he took a seat next to Jin. “You’re the one sitting over here staring into space and sighing non-stop.”
Jin sighed again.
Yuichi rolled his eyes as he reached out to mess Jin’s hair. Jin tried not to smile at that action, partly because he didn’t want Yuichi to notice how much he was enjoying it, and partly because he still hadn’t fully come to terms with the fact that he might be just a little bit interested in his friend. Just a little…
“You’re like a dog.”
“Huh?” Jin sat up, staring at Yuichi, who just chuckled.
“What? I’m just saying that you’re behaving like a dog. Next thing I know, you’ll be wagging your tail at me.”
“I don’t have a tail.”
“That’s a relief to know.”
“I don’t understand how my behaviour appears like that of a dog to you.” Jin pouted.
“You just remind me of Mister.”
“Your pet dog?” Jin paused. “He’s cute.” He paused some more, before a smirk appeared on his face. “Does that mean that you think I’m cute too?”
Jin noticed Yuichi’s jaw drop a little, a slight pink hue colouring the latter’s cheeks. But Yuichi quickly collected himself. “No, it means I think that you’re an animal.”
“You’re not being honest, Yuichi.” Jin said as he poked Yuichi’s nose. “It’s no wonder you have such a big nose. It’s going to grow longer and longer the more lies you tell.”
“What makes you so sure I’m lying?”
“Because it’s obvious that you do think that I’m cute.” Jin stated matter-of-factly.
Yuichi was about to disagree but was interrupted when they were called back from their break while Jin just waved at him dismissively. As they were walking towards where the others were, Jin poked Yuichi in the shoulder.
“Ne~ Are you free later?” Jin asked, hoping he didn’t sound too desperate. “Want to hang out?”
“Uh, I’m going out with Kame later…” Yuichi hesitated. “Do you wanna join us?”
“Ah, nah, no thanks.” Jin shook his head. Things were awkward between him and the youngest member, and there was no need to put Yuichi in between. “Another time then?”
Yuichi smiled apologetically. “Yep, another time.”
* * * * *
“Kame, you’re drinking too much.” Yuichi said as he tried to grab the glass away from Kazuya.
“I’m already 20, remember?” Kazuya drawled as he leaned in close to Yuichi. “You don’t have to worry. I can take care of myself.”
“That’s what you always think.” Yuichi muttered to himself.
“Hm, what did you say?” Leaning even closer to Yuichi if it was possible, Kazuya asked loudly. “What did you say? I didn’t hear you!”
“I didn’t say anything. You’re so drunk that you’re imagining things.”
“Liar!” Kazuya pointed at Yuichi, before laughing and poking Yuichi’s nose. “That’s why your nose is so big!”
Yuichi blinked as he thought he saw Jin in front of him where Kazuya should have been. It must have been the effects of alcohol, he told himself, shaking his head and deciding that he should bring Kazuya back to the latter’s apartment.
“I’m bringing you home.” Yuichi said as he pulled Kazuya up.
“You’re bringing me to your home?”
“No, I’m bringing you back to yours.”
“Oh.” Kazuya nodded as he allowed himself to be pulled along. “That’s… kind of a disappointment.”
“I have no idea what you mean by that.” Yuichi raised an eyebrow. “You’re obviously very drunk.”
“No, no… not drunk.”
Yuichi was about to say something but realised that there was no point, and didn’t bother saying anything else until they reached Kazuya’s apartment. He pressed the doorbell, hoping that Tomohisa was in to answer the door but to no avail.
“Pi’s not in.” Kazuya mumbled, arms draped all over Yuichi. “I won’t see him until next week, so you can stay over tonight.”
“Why would I want to stay over tonight?” Yuichi frowned as he tried to find Kazuya’s keys. “And where did you put your keys?”
“I don’t know… in my bag?”
After some digging, Yuichi finally found the keys and let them both into the apartment, dumping his friend onto the bed. But as he did so, Kazuya tugged strongly at Yuichi’s clothes, and the combination of the pull and his imbalance due to the alcohol, Yuichi found himself falling on top of Kazuya.
“Ow!” Kazuya whined as Yuichi winced at the impact.
“Don’t complain. You’re the one who pulled me down.”
“You’re lying again. You fell on top of me on purpose.” Kazuya remarked. “And you clearly don’t intend to get off me either.”
“I would if you didn’t have your arms around me like I’m your pillow!”
“I do?” Kazuya paused, blinking at Yuichi. There was a brief moment of silence, before Kazuya spoke again. “Nakamaru, you’re actually quite cute up close.”
“Huh?”
Before Yuichi could even comprehend what Kazuya had just said, warm lips touched his own, and he wasn’t quite sure what he did after that.
* * * * *
© Copyrighted by O-Baka! | Home
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geez Jac, don’t write stuff like that. it makes me wanna hug you and I know you hate that XD”
*huggles you anyway* ♥
Jin-muse can be a real attention-whore, I agree XD But as long as he keeps you writing, I don’t mind :3
really, don’t bother reading it. I only skipped through most of the parts but that was eh.. entertainng enough *lmao* the other one wasn’t that bad, though.
and don’t worry about it! I’m glad you’re sending me links, for you know I don’t get around checking lj or anywhere else for that matter XD